Tuesday, December 31, 2013

Nice line from Ratan Tata's Lecture-
If u want to Walk Fast,
Walk Alone.
But
if u want to Walk Far,
Walk Together.
How strange it is
We wish to wear high brands
but we feel most comfortable in pajayma
pants.
We wish to sit in Taj & Marriot with elite
people
but we enjoy roadside tea with friends and
with ppl we love..the most.
We wish to own big cars and go on long drives
yet we talk our heart out only while walking
down a long road.
We have 64GB iPods filled with songs
but sometimes a song on the radio brings a
smile that can't be compared.
πŸ’₯ Life is simple indeed
But We make it complex by running after what
NEVER gives us joy.....
Love life
Take note of small things....!!! πŸ”–
Keep SmilingπŸ˜€
Zindagi pal-pal dhalti hai .....
Jaise ret mutthi se fisalti hai ....⏳
Shikwe kitne bhi ho har pal fir bhi haste
rehna ...
Kyonki yeh zindgi jaisi bhi hai ..
Bas ek hi bar Milti hai...😊😊 Happy Year EndingπŸ˜€πŸ˜€

Tuesday, December 24, 2013

Womens Confidence :

One night President Obama and his wife Michelle decided to do something out of routine and go for a casual dinner at a restaurant that wasn't too luxurious.

When they were seated, the owner of the restaurant asked the President's secret service if he could please speak to the First Lady in private.

They obliged and Michelle had a conversation with the owner.

After the conversation President Obama asked Michelle, "Why was he so interested in talking to you?"

She mentioned that in her teenage years, he had been madly in love with her.

President Obama then said, "So if you had married him, you would now be the owner of this lovely restaurant?"

Michelle responded, "No, if I had married him, he would now be the President."


A WOMAN's CONFIDENCE NEVER COMES IN BITS & PIECESπŸ’ƒπŸ’ƒ

Thursday, December 19, 2013

The Suitcase

A man died, when he realized it, he saw God coming closer with a suitcase in his hand.
- God said: Alright son its time to go.
- surprised the man responded: Now? So soon? I had a lot of plans...
- I'm sorry but its time to go.

- What do you have in that suitcase? the man asked.
- God answered: Your belongings.
- My belongings? you mean my things, my clothes, my money?
-God answered: Those things were not yours they belonged to the earth.

- Is it my memories? the man asked.
-God answered: those never belonged to you they belonged to Time

- Is it my talents?
-God answered: those were never yours they belonged to the circumstances.

- Is it my friends and family?
-God answered: I'm sorry they were never yours they belonged to the path.

- Is it my wife and son?
- God answered: They were never yours the belonged to your heart.

- Is it my body?
- God answered: that was never yours it belonged to the dust.

-Is it my soul?
God answered: No that is mine.

Full of fear, the man took the suitcase from god and opened it just to find out the suitcase was empty.
- With a tear coming down his cheek the man said: I never had anything???
-God answered: that is correct, every moment you lived were only yours. Life is just a moment. a moment that belongs to you. For this reason enjoy this time while you have it. Don't let anything that you think you own stop you from doing so.
-Live Now
-Live your life
- Don't forget to be happy, that is the only thing that matters.
- Material things and everything else that you fought for stay here.
-YOU CAN'T TAKE ANYTHING

Monday, November 25, 2013

A Small Story…
A boy and a girl were playing together. The boy
had a collection of marbles. The girl had some
sweets with her. The boy told the girl that he will
give her all his marbles in exchange for her
sweets. The girl agreed. The boy kept the biggest and the most beautiful
marble aside and gave the rest to the girl. The girl
gave ......him all her sweets as she had promised.
That night, the girl slept peacefully. But the boy
couldn't sleep as he kept wondering if the girl
had hidden some sweets from him the way he had hidden his best marble.
Moral of the story: If you don't give your
hundred percent in a relationship, you'll always
keep doubting if the other person has given his/
her hundred percent.. This is applicable for any
relationship like friendship, employer, love relationship etc., Give your hundred percent to
everything you do and sleep peacefully...

Saturday, November 23, 2013

Apni takleef meh mujhe umeed samajna,
Koi gum aaye toh nazdeek samajna,
De saku muskurahat ansoo ke badle toh hazaro meh thoda sa kareeb samajna.

Saturday, November 16, 2013

Awesome msg:

Ek Sach Chupa Hota Hai :- Jab Koi Kisi Ko Kehta Hai Ki "Mazaak Tha Yaar".

Ek Feeling Chupi Hoti Hai :- Jab Koi Kehta Hai "Mujhe Koi Farq Nahi Padta".

Ek Dard Chupa Hota Hai :- Jab Koi Kehta Hai "Its Ok".

Ek Zarurat Chupi Hoti Hai :- Jab Koi Kehta Hai "Mujhe Akela Chhod Do".

Ek Gehri Baat Chupi Hoti Hai :- Jab Koi Kehta Hai "Pata Nahi".😐

Ek Samundar Chupa Hota Hai Baato Ka :- Jab Koi "Khamosh Rehta Hai".....

Isi liye ek Open Heart Surgery unit k baahar likha huwa tha k....

"Agar Dil Khol Lete Apne Yaaro Ke Saath,
To Aaj Kholna Na Padta Auozaro K Saath"
πŸ”§πŸ”©πŸ”ͺ

"Share Life With True FriendsπŸ‘¬πŸ‘­

Saturday, October 19, 2013

F A M I L Y

I banged into a stranger as he passed by,
'Oh excuse me please' was my reply.
He said, 'Please excuse me too;
I couldn't see you coming.'
We were very polite, this stranger and I.
We went on our way and we said goodbye.

But at home a different story is told,
How we treat our loved ones, young and old.
Later that day, cooking the evening meal,
My son stood beside me very still.
When I turned, I nearly knocked him down.
'Move out of the way,' I said with a frown.
He walked away, his little heart broken.
I didn't realize how harshly I'd spoken.
While I lay awake in bed,
God's small voice came to me and said,
'While dealing with a stranger, common courtesy you use,
but the family you love, you seem to abuse.
Go and look on the kitchen floor,
You'll find some flowers there by the door.
Those are the flowers he brought for you.
He picked them himself: pink, yellow and blue.
He stood very quietly not to spoil the surprise,
you never saw the tears that filled his little eyes.'
By this time, I felt very small,
And now my tears began to fall.
I quietly went and knelt by his bed;
'Wake up, little one, wake up,' I said.
'Are these the flowers you picked for me?'
He smiled, 'I found 'em, out by the tree.
I picked 'em because they're pretty like you.
I knew you'd like 'em, especially the blue.'
I said, 'Son, I'm very sorry for the way I acted today;
I shouldn't have yelled at you that way.'
He said, 'Oh, Mom, that's okay.
I love you anyway.'
I said, 'Son, I love you too,
and I do like the flowers, especially the blue.'



FAMILY

Are you aware that if we died tomorrow, the company

that we are working for could easily replace us in


a matter of days.

But the family we left behind will feel the loss

for the rest of their lives.

And come to think of it, we pour ourselves more

into work than into our own family,

an unwise investment indeed,

don't you think?

So what is behind the story?

Wednesday, October 16, 2013

This is awesome. :

One Day We All Will Depart
On A Journey Free Of Cost
Don't Worry about Seat Reservation
It is Confirmed
& Flight Is Always On time.
Our Good Deeds Will Be Our Luggage
Humanity Will Be Our Passport,
Love Will Be Our Visa,
Make sure we do our best to Travel to Heaven in Business Class !
✈✈✈✈
Lateral thinking....

Many years ago in a small Indian village, a farmer had the misfortune of owing a large sum of money to a village moneylender. The moneylender, who was old and ugly, fancied the farmer's beautiful daughter.

So he proposed a bargain.

He said he would forgo the farmer's debt if he could marry his Daughter. Both the farmer and his daughter were horrified by the proposal. So the cunning money-lender suggested that they let providence decide the matter.

He told them that he would put a black pebble and a white pebble into an empty money bag. Then the girl would have to pick one pebble from the bag.

1) If she picked the black pebble, she would become his wife and her Father's debt would be forgiven.

2) If she picked the white pebble she need not marry him and her Father's debt would still be forgiven.

3) But if she refused to pick a pebble, her father would be thrown into Jail.

They were standing on a pebble strewn path in the farmer's field. As they talked, the moneylender bent over to pick up two pebbles. As he picked them up, the sharp-eyed girl noticed that he had picked up two black pebbles and put them into the bag. He then asked the girl to pick a pebble from the bag.

Now, imagine that you were standing in the field.

What would you have done if you were the girl?

If you had to advise her, what would you have told her?

Careful analysis would produce three possibilities:

1. The girl should refuse to take a pebble.

2. The girl should show that there were two black pebbles in the bag and expose the money-lender as a cheat.

3. The girl should pick a black pebble and sacrifice herself in order To save her father from his debt and imprisonment.

Take a moment to ponder over the story.

The above story is used with the hope that it will make us appreciate the difference between lateral and logical thinking.

The girl's dilemma cannot be solved with traditional logical thinking. Think of the consequences if she chooses the above logical answers.























What would you recommend to the girl to do? .... C below!!

Well, here is what she did....

















The girl put her hand into the moneybag and drew out a pebble. Without Looking at it, she fumbled and let it fall onto the pebble-strewn path where it immediately became lost among all the other pebbles.

"Oh, how clumsy of me," she said. "But never mind, if you look into the Bag for the one that is left, you will be able to tell which pebble I Picked."

Since the remaining pebble is black, it must be assumed that she had picked the white one. And since the money-lender dared not admit his Dishonesty, the girl changed what seemed an impossible situation into an extremely advantageous one.

Moral of the story:
Most complex problems do have a solution. It is only that we don't attempt.

Saturday, October 12, 2013

Cockroach Theory for Self Development :
=========================

At a restaurant, a cockroach suddenly flew from somewhere and sat on a lady. She started screaming out of fear. With a panic stricken face and trembling voice, she started jumping, with both her hands desperately trying to get rid of the cockroach. Her reaction was contagious, as everyone in her group also got panicky.

The lady finally managed to push the cockroach away but …it landed on another lady in the group.
Now, it was the turn of the other lady in the group to
continue the drama. The waiter rushed forward to their rescue.
In the relay of throwing, the cockroach next fell upon the waiter. The waiter stood firm, composed himself and observed the behavior of the cockroach on his shirt. When he was confident enough, he grabbed it with his fingers and threw it out of the restaurant.

Sipping my coffee and watching the amusement, the antenna of my mind picked up a few thoughts and started wondering, was the cockroach responsible for their histrionic behavior?
If so, then why was the waiter not disturbed?
He handled it near to perfection, without any chaos. It is not the cockroach, but the inability of the ladies to handle the disturbance caused by the cockroach that disturbed the ladies.

I realized that, it is not the shouting of my father or my boss or my wife that disturbs me, but it's my inability to handle the disturbances caused by their shouting that
disturbs me. It's not the traffic jams on the road that disturbs me, but my inability to handle the disturbance caused by the traffic jam that disturbs me.
More than the problem, it's my reaction to the problem that creates chaos in my life.

Lessons learnt from the story:

Do not react in life. Always respond.
The women reacted, whereas the waiter responded.
Reactions are always instinctive whereas responses are always well thought of, just and right to save a situation from going out of hands, to avoid cracks in relationship, to avoid taking decisions in anger, anxiety, stress or hurry.

Friday, October 11, 2013

Some Truths of life....

Truth no 1 : nobody is real in this world except your parents..

Truth no. 2 : a poor person has no friends..

Truth no. 3 : people do not like good thoughts they like good looks..

Truth no 4 : people respect the money not the person..

Truth no 5 : the person you love the most, will hurt you the most !

"Truth is Simple, But, The Moment YOU try to Explain it...It Becomes Difficult"

"When you are happy you enjoy the music", but"when you are sad, you understand the lyrics".

IN LIFE: Two things define you.

"Your patience when you have nothing"
& "your attitude when you have everything" ♥

Tuesday, October 1, 2013

This is the ultimate 😜😜
Sardarji's Mom's Letter

Dear Banta
Wahe Guru!

I'm in a well here & hoping you are in the same well there. I'm writing this letter slowly, because I know you cannot read fast.

We don't live where we did when you left home. Your dad read in the newspaper that most accidents happen 20 miles from home, so we moved 20 miles.

I wont be able to send the address as the last Sardar who stayed here took the house numbers with them for their new house so they would not have to change their address. Hopefully by next week we will be able to bring our earlier address plate here, so that our address will remain same too.

This place is really nice. It even has a washing machine, situated right above the commode. I'm not sure how it works. Last week I put in 3 shirts, pulled the chain & haven't seen them since.

The weather here isn't too bad. It rained only twice last week. The first time it rained for 3 days & second time for 4 days.

The coat you wanted me to send you, your Aunt said it would be a little too heavy to send in the mail with all the metal buttons, so we cut them off & put them in the pocket.

Your father has another job. He has 500 men under him. He is cutting the grass at the cemetery.

By the way I took Bahu to our club's poolside. The manager is really badmash. He told her that two-piece swimming suit is not allowed in this club. We were confused as to which piece should we remove?

Your sister had a baby this morning. I haven't found out whether it is a girl or a boy, so I don't know whether you are an Aunt or Uncle.

Your uncle, Jetinder fell in a nearby well. Some men tried to pull him out, but he fought them off bravely & drowned. We cremated him & he burned for 3 days.

Your best friend Balwinder is no more. He died trying to fulfill his father's last wishes. His father had wished to be buried at sea after he died. And your friend died while in the process of digging a grave for his father.

There isn't much more news this time. Nothing much has happened.

P.S: Beta, I was going to send you some money but by the time I realized, I had already sealed off this letterπŸ‚
A DAD'S SPEECH AT HIS DAUGHTER'S WEDDING

I thought I would start my speech by addressing you as the "new" family of my daughter. But I think it would be inappropriate because now that she is married, you are "the family" for her. Believe me; I don't have a problem with that. I, in fact, want my daughter to have "you" as her priority now. Its time for us to take a backseat in her life. We would happily accept it but would surely request one thing- please keep her happy!

I am more than sure that you will keep her very happy. She will perhaps be happier than what she used to be here. But like all fathers, I obsess over my daughter's happiness which is making me say this over and over again- please keep her happy!

She never was and will never be a burden for me. She is in fact the reason why I breathe and smile. I am getting her married because this is what the law of nature demands. I am helpless in the face of our culture and therefore sending her to your home. She was the happiness of my home and will now light up your home. I am giving my world to you. Please make sure it remains beautiful. I am giving away my princess to you. Please make sure she stays as a queen. I have raised her with my sweat and blood and now she is wonderfully perfect. For all the care, love, beauty and warmth my daughter will bring into your lives, I just want her happiness in return—please keep her happy!

If at times you think that my daughter has said or done something wrong, feel free to scold her. But handle her with love. She is very fragile. If at times she feels low, be with her. She just needs a little bit of your attention. If at times she feels sick, show her some care. It's the medicine that works best for her. If at times she fails to fulfill a responsibility, feel free to chastise her. But empathize with her. She is still learning. Do understand her—please keep her happy!

I don't mind if I don't get to see her for months. I don't mind if I am not able to talk to her on a daily basis. I would be more than happy if she doesn't remember me much. But, my only motive in life has been my daughter's happiness which is now in your hands. I beg you, please keep her happy.

Dear son-in-law, these words may not mean much to you now but if you are lucky enough to father a daughter someday, you will appreciate them better when you will find every beat of your heart shouting – "please keep her happy"!

When a girl gets married, she steps out of her own heaven and enters into a world full of uncertainties just to keep a family running and lives blooming. For this great sacrifice of hers, even the heavenly angels request just one thing – "please keep her happy"

Wednesday, September 25, 2013

know
They r fine but
We call & ask
Abhe Kaisa Hai?

We know
This can't happen but
We say
Bhul gaya na Muje?

We know
They can't go
Without us but
We say
Mere liye rukna

We know
They will share
Everything
With us but
We say
Muje nahi
Batayega?

We know
They r with us in
Every Problem but
We ask
Mera Sath
Dega na?

We know
It's impossible to
Survive
Without them but
We say
Muje Tujse
Bat nahi karni

Friends r
Best Part of
Life
Dedicated to
my Friends.
Send to all ur best friends...

Wednesday, September 18, 2013

This is Nice......

READ IT... FEEL IT...
A Construction Supervisor from 16th Floor of a Building was calling a Worker on Ground Floor.

Because of noice,
the Worker
did not Hear his Call.

To draw Attention,
the Supervisor threw a 10 Rupee Note
in Front of Worker.

He picked up the Note, put it in His Pocket &
Continued to Work.

Again to Draw Attention m.Supervisor now threw 500 Rupee Note & the Worker did the same,

Now the Supervisor picked a small Stone & threw on the Worker.

The Stone hit the Worker.

This time the Worker looked Up &
the Supervisor Communicated with Him.
.
.
This Story is same as of our 'LIFE'...

Lord from Up,
wants to Communicate with Us,
but We are Busy doing our Worldly Jobs.

Then, God give Us Small Gifts & big gifts
We just keep it without Seeing
from Where We Got it.
We are the Same.
Just keep
without Thanking God, We just say
We are LUCKY.

Then when We are Hit with a Small Stone, which We call PROBLEMS,
then We look Up & Communicate with God. πŸ’«
Worth reading...😊..

A King had a male servant who, in all circumstances always said to him; My king, do not be discouraged because everything God does is perfect, no mistakes. One day, they went hunting and a wild animal attacked the king,the servant managed to kill the animal but couldn't prevent his majesty from losing a finger. Furious and without showing gratitude, the King said; if God was good,
I would not have been attacked and lost one finger. The servant replied;
Despite all these things, I can only tell you that God is good and everything He does is perfect, He is never wrong. Outraged by the response, the king ordered the arrest of his servant. Later, he left for another hunt and was captured by savages who use human beings for sacrifice. In the altar, the savages found out that the king didn't have one finger in place, he was released because he was considered not "complete" to be offered to their gods.
On his return to the palace, he authorized the release of his servant and said; My friend, God was really good to me. I was almost killed but for lack of a single finger I was let go. But I have a question; If God is so good, why did He allow me to put you in jail?. He replied; My king, if I had gone with you, I would have been sacrificed because I have no missing finger. Everything God does is perfect, He is never wrong.
Often we complain about life, and the negative things that happen to us, forgetting that nothing is random,
and that everything has a purpose. God knows why he chose you to receive this
message today....have a blessed one...😊
A young man asked a rich old man: How he made his money ?

The old guy said: Son, it was 1932, The Depth of The Great Depression, I was down to my last nickel. I invested that in an apple and spent the entire day polishing it and at the end of the day, I sold the apple for 10 Cents..!

The next day, I invested those 10 Cents in 2 apples. I spent the entire day polishing them & sold them for 20 Cents.

I continued this 4 a month, by the end of which I had accumulated a fortune Of $.1.37.

Then my wife's father died & left us 2 Million Dollars...!

MORAL: Hard work is just shit.. Find a chick whose father is rich...😜

Saturday, September 14, 2013

A story of an Expert..

A giant ship engine failed. The ship's owners tried one expert after another, but none of them could figure out how to fix the engine.
Then they brought in an old man who had been fixing ships since he was a young boy. He carried a large bag of tools with him, & when he arrived, he immediately went to work. He inspected the engine very carefully, top to bottom. 2 of the ship's owners were there, watching this man, hoping he would know what to do.

After looking things over, the old man reached into his bag & pulled out a small hammer. He gently tapped something. Instantly, the engine lurched into life. He carefully put his hammer away.
The engine was fixed!

A week later, the owners received a bill from the old man for 10,000 dollars.
"What?!" the owners exclaimed. "He hardly did anything!"

So they wrote to the old man a note saying, "Please send us an itemized Bill."

The man sent a Bill that read:
Tapping with a hammer......$ 2.00
Knowing where to tap.....$ 9998.00

Moral of the story:
Effort is important, But Knowing Where to Make an Effort in Life Makes all the Difference...!!!
πŸ˜€πŸ˜ƒπŸ˜œ

Thursday, September 12, 2013

One day a farmer's donkey fell down into a well. The animal cried piteously for hours as the farmer tried to figure out what to do. Finally, he decided the animal was old, and the well needed to be covered up anyway; it just wasn't worth it to retrieve the donkey.

He invited all his neighbors to come over and help him. They all grabbed a shovel and began to shovel dirt into the well. At first, the donkey realized what was happening and cried horribly. Then, to everyone's amazement he quieted down.

A few shovel loads later, the farmer finally looked down the well. He was astonished at what he saw. With each shovel of dirt that hit his back, the donkey was doing something amazing. He would shake it off and take a step up.

As the farmer's neighbors continued to shovel dirt on top of the animal, he would shake it off and take a step up. Pretty soon, everyone was amazed as the donkey stepped up over the edge of the well and happily trotted off!

MORAL :
Life is going to shovel dirt on you, all kinds of dirt. The trick to getting out of the well is to shake it off and take a step up. Each of our troubles is a steppingstone. We can get out of the deepest wells just by not stopping, never giving up! Shake it off and take a step up.

Remember the five simple rules to be happy:

1. Free your heart from hatred - Forgive.

2. Free your mind from worries - Most never happens.

3. Live simply and appreciate what you have.

4. Give more.

5. Expect less from people but more from yourself.

You have two choices... smile and close
While cutting hair, the official Barber asked the Minister Kapil Sibal, ''What's this Swiss Bank issue?"

Kapil Sibal shouted, "YOU, are you cutting hair or conducting an inquiry?"
Barber: Sorry Sir, I just asked.

Next day, while cutting the hair, he asked President Pranab Mukherjee,
"Sir, what's this Black money issue?''

Pranab shouted, ''Why did you ask me this question?''

Barber: ''Sorry Sir, just asked you''

Next day, CBI interrogated the Barber, ''Are you an agent of Baba Ramdev?''

Barber: No Sir.

CBI: Are you the agent of Anna Hazare?

Barber: No Sir.

CBI: Then while cutting the hair, why did you ask these VIP's about Swiss Bank and Black money issues?

Barber: Sir, I do not know why, when I ask about Swiss Bank or Black money, their hairs stand up straight; and that helps me to cut the hair easily; that's why I keep asking."
Truth.....Must read each n every sentence ....

Truth no 1 : nobody is real in this world except Mother..

Truth no. 2 : a poor person has no friends..

Truth no. 3 : people do not like good thoughts they like good looks..

Truth no 4 : people respect the money not the person..

Truth no 5 : the person you love the most, will hurt you the most !



"Truth is Simple, But, The Moment YOU try to Explain it...It Becomes Difficult"


"When you are happy you enjoy the music", but "when you are sad, you understand the lyrics".


IN LIFE: Two things define you.

"Your patience when you have
nothing" .........&...... "your attitude when you have everything".

Sunday, September 1, 2013

Confession by a girl and an amazing reply she got .......

The Girl:
Dad, I am in love with a boy who is far away from me.
I am in India and he lives in UK but,
we met on matrimonial website...
became friends on fb....
had long chats on whatsapp...
voice chats on wechat....
proposed each other on skype....
and now 2 months relationship through viber.....
I need your blessings & good wishes  oh daddy...

The dad replies:
Now get married on Twitter.....
have fun on tango...
buy your kids from eBay....
send them through Gmail...
and if you are fed up with your husband........
OLX pe bech de.....

Plzz reply!!........
Once there was a young girl who decided to take a short cut home from school. The fastest way to her house was to cut through an alley. The girl approached the alley way.

She saw a man standing like he was waiting for someone. She said a prayer: "Dear God, please lead me through this alleyway, safe and unharmed. Amen!"

The girl walked through the alley and past the man. Later on that night the girl decided to watch the news. She saw that man had raped and murdered a young girl.

The police said the man told them another girl had passed through the alley 10 minutes before. When they asked him why he hadn't attacked the first girl, he said that there was a man walking beside her.

God walks with us. We deny His presences but He is always there. 95% of people will just read this and shut their phones, but be among the 5% that will read and send to friends. Don't be ashamed to admit you're a child of God.

Sorry, I had no choice I am a child of God!  This is a test to see who has more followers, God or Satan.
If God, forward to ten people,
if Satan, close the phone.

Let me pray for you:
1) You'll find favor with
     someone you don't expect,
     Amen!
2) You'll be too relevant to be
     ignored, Amen!
3) You'll encounter God and
     will never remain the
     same, Amen!
4) The grace for completion
     will come on you, you shall
     be blessed till the blessed
     call you blessed, Amen!
5) The hand that will send this
     message to others shall
     not labor in vain, Amen!
6) The mouth saying 'Amen'
     to this prayer shall laugh
     forever, Amen!

Very soon, and I say, very very soon, GOD is going to do a miracle and lift you up for GOOD.

Here's a test: If you love God and you're not ashamed of Him, send this to ten people and watch what He does for you today, including me; if I don't get it back, I guess I'm not one of them.

As SOON as you get five replies, someone you love, will quietly surprise you..

Monday, August 26, 2013

Masterpiece on Economics !!!

One day a tourist comes to the only hotel in a debt ridden town in Africa.

Lays a 100 dollar note on the table & goes to inspect the rooms.

Hotel owner takes the note & rushes to pay his debt to the butcher.

Butcher runs to pay the pig farmer. Pig farmer runs to pay the feed supplier.

Supplier runs to pay the prostitute, who in these hard times gave her services on credit.

Hooker then runs to pay off her debt to the hotel owner for the rooms she rented for her clients.

Hotel owner then lays the 100 dollar note back on the counter.

The tourist comes down, takes his money & leaves as he did not like the rooms.

No one earned anything.
But the town is now without debt & looks to the future with a lot of optimism.

And that is how the world is doing business today...!!!

Monday, August 19, 2013

Kitabo Ke Panne Palat Ke Sochte Hai,
Yu Palat Jaye Zindagi To Kya Baat Hai.

Tamanna Jo Puri Ho Khwabo Me,
Haqikat Ban Jae To Kya Baat Hai.

Kuch Log Matlab Ke Liye Dhundte Hai Mujhe,
Bina Matlab Koi Aye To Kya Baat Hai.

Katal Kar Ke To Sab Le Jayenge Dil Mera,
Koi Apna Bana Ke Le Jaye To Kya Baat Hai.

Jo Sharifo Ki Sharaft Me Na Ho Baat,
Ek Sharabi Keh Jaye To Kya Baat Hai.

Zinda Rehne Tak To Khushi Denge Sabko,
Kisiko Meri Maut Pe Bhi Khushi Mil Jaye To Kya Baat Hai.....

Monday, August 12, 2013

THE NEW GET BLOCKED PJ's
Boy : Whats your Name??

Girl: Palak and you

Boy: Paneer
*BLOCKED!!!*

Girl : Hello i am khusbu

Boy : khusbu ka dusra naam bharosa agarbati....kone kone me khusbu faila de
**blocked**

Boy:hi, wats ur name??

Girl: its Neha Singhal.

Boy: oh. . M also Single.
*blocked*

Girl: What's Up?
Boy: Uttar Pradesh...
*gets blocked*

Girl : tu soya hai...??
Boy : Nahi...! Schezwan hu..!
*Gets Blocked Instantly*

Girl: I'm free tommorow!
Boy: pehle kya paid thi??
*GETS BLOCKED*

Boy: aj mausam achha h mall chalte h.
Girl: waha kya karenge??
Boy: hawan karenge, hawan karenge.
*blocked*

Girl : see ya!

Boy: ram chandar ki jai
!Blocked*

Girl: Have a Good Day....

Boy: No thank you... I like Parle-G more...
*BLOCKED*

Girl: I need some Space.

Boy: Ok then go to Sonakshi Sinha's forehead.
*Blocked*

Girl puts up her status :" waiting for CHENNAIEXPRESS "…
Boy: COOLIE hai kya? ?
*Blocked*

Boy- Thank you

Girl-My pleasure

Boy- My Bajaj Pulsar
*Reported as spam*
*Blocked Forever

Sunday, August 4, 2013

Mere adhoore sapne...πŸ‘₯πŸ’­πŸ’­πŸ’­

Jab bachapan tha toh jawani dream tha…

jab jawan hue toh bachpan desire hain ….

Jab ghar mein rehte they azadi achi lagti thi…

Aaj akele hain toh har pal ghar ke din yaad aate hain..…

Kabhi hotel mein jana… pizza, burger khana…. Pasand hoti thi..…

Aaj ghar par aana aur maa ke hath ke khane mein hi janaat hain....

Jinse jhagadte they school mein un dosto ko internet mein talashte hain..…

Aaj kal toh khush rehne ke tarike bhi hum google mein search marte hain….

Facebook se dating…. Aur flipkart, ebay se shopping karte hain …

Ghar par bhi baat ab skype/gtalk se karte hain…

Life ko laptop aur mobile mein samet dia hain….

Hum samjate hain humne khud ko update kia hain….

Iss nai dunia mein humne kya guma dia….

Kab kya badla hume kuch na pata chala..

Paisa mila naam mila… kuch hain hum mein bhi yeh vishwas mila…

Par kya choda… kya tyaga humne… iska na hisab mila….

Khushi kisme hoti hain… yeh pata ab chala hain…..

Bachapan kya tha iska ehsaas ab hua hain..

Kash badal sakta mein zindgai ke kuch saal pichale….

Kash jee sakta mein zindagi ek baar fir se…

Kash mil sakta bachpan mujhko ek baar firse…πŸ™‡

Wednesday, July 24, 2013

10 Things God Won't Ask You

1...God won't ask what kind of car you drove,
He'll ask how many people you drove who didn't have transportation.

2...God won't ask the square footage of your house,
He'll ask how many people you welcomed into your home.

3...God won't ask about the clothes you had in your closet,
He'll ask how many you helped to clothe.

4...God won't ask what your highest salary was,
He'll ask if you compromised your character to obtain it.

5...God won't ask what your job title was,
He'll ask if you performed your job to the best of your ability.

6...God won't ask how many friends you had,
He'll ask how many people to whom you were a friend.

7...God won't ask in what neighborhood you lived,
He'll ask how you treated your neighbors.

8...God won't ask about the color of your skin,
He'll ask about the content of your character.

9...God won't ask how much did you make your business grow,
He'll ask how much did you help others to grow.

10...God won't ask if you loved and worshiped him,
He'll ask how much did you love and worship your parents,

stay blessed..

Friday, July 19, 2013

Some global opinions on marriages .....
When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.
-Lee Majors

After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together.
-Al Gore

By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.
-Socrates

Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them.
-Mike Tyson

The great question.. which I have not been able to answer... is, "What does a woman want?
-George Clooney

I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me.
-Bill Clinton

"Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays."
-George W. Bush

"I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years."
-Rudy Giuliani

"There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage."
-Michael Jordan

"I've had bad luck with all my wives. The first one left me and the second one didn't." The third gave me more children!
-Donald Trump

Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming
1. Whenever you're wrong, admit it,
2. Whenever you're right, shut up.
-Shaquille O'Neal

The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once...
-Kobe Bryant

You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to.
-David Hasselhoff

My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.
-Alec Baldwin

A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.
-Barack Obama

Marriage is the only war where one sleeps with the enemy.
-Tommy Lee

Monday, July 1, 2013

There was a man with four wives.
He loved his fourth wife the most
and took a great care of her and
gave her the best.
He also loved his third wife and
always wanted to show her off to
his friends. However, he was always
had a fear that she might runaway
with some other man.
He loved his second wife too.
Whenever he faced some problems,
he always turned to his second wife
and she would always help him out.
He did not love his first wife though
she loved him deeply, was very loyal
to him and took great care of him.
One day the man fell very ill and
knew that he is going to die soon.
He told himself, "I have four wives
with me. I will take one of them
along with me when I die to keep
company in my death."
Thus, he asked the fourth wife to
die along with him and keep
company. "No way!" she replied and
walked away without another word.
He asked his third wife.She said
"Life is so good over here. I'm going
to remarry when you die".
He then asked his second wife. She
said "I'm Sorry. I can't help you this
time around. At the most I can only
accompany you til your grave."
By now his heart sank and turned
cold.
Then a voice called out: "I'll leave
with you. I'll follow you no matter
where you go." the man looked up
and there was his first wife.
She was so skinny, almost like she
suffered from malnutrition.
Greatly grieved, the man said, "I
should have taken much better care
of you while I could have!"
Actually, we all have four wives in
our lives.
a. The fourth wife is our body. No
matter how much time and effort
we lavish in making it look good,
it'll leave us when w die.
b. The third wife is our possessions,
status and wealth. When we die,
they go to others.
c. the second wife is our family and
friends. No matter how close they
had been there for us when we're
alive, the furthest they can stay by
us is up to the grave.
d. the first wife is the our soul,
neglected in our pursuit of material
wealth and pleasure. It is actually
the only thing that follows us
wherever we go.

Tuesday, June 25, 2013

WASHINGTON ORGANISED A COMPETITION OF TWO-LINE POEM IN WHICH FIRST LINE MUST BE THE MOST ROMANTIC, BUT SECOND LINE SHOULD BE THE LEAST ROMANTIC.

This is the winner :

My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife,
Marrying you screwed up my life.

I see your face when I am dreaming.
That's why I always wake up screaming.

Kind, intelligent, loving and hot;
This describes everything you are not.

I love your smile, your face and your eyes,
Damn, I'm good at telling lies!

My feelings for you, no words can tell,
Except for maybe 'Go to hell.'

What inspired this amazing rhyme?
Two parts tequila, one part lime !

Sunday, June 16, 2013

One afternoon a wealthy Sindhi was riding in his limousine when he saw two men along the roadside eating grass. Disturbed, he ordered his driver to stop and he got out to investigate. He asked one man "Why are you eating grass?"
"We don't have any money for food," the poor man replied. "We have to eat grass."
"Well, then, you can come with me to my house and I'll feed you", the Sindhi said.
"But sir, I have a wife and two children with me. They are over there, under that tree."
"Bring them along," the Sindhi replied.
Turning to the other poor man he stated, "You also come with us."
The second man, in a pitiful voice then said, "But sir, I also have a wife and SIX children with me!"
"Bring them all, as well," the Sindhi answered.
They all entered the car, which was no easy task, even for a car as large as the limousine was..
Once underway, one of the poor fellows turned to the Sindhi and said, "Sir, you are too kind. Thank you for taking all of us with you."
The Sindhi replied, "Glad to do it. You'll really love my place;

The grass at my place is almost 1 meter high.."😝😝😝😝😝😝

Thursday, June 13, 2013

It's the second Week of June...!!

Dis is dat wonderful time when some years back, d most exciting things of our lives used to happen....

"Our school used to re-open...!!!"

For a moment, just think of it all.......
And try, if u can visualize those days....

Dat xcitement of a New Bag...!!

New Books....!!

The end of an exiciting vacation, wd a tinge of sadness....!

A bit of anxitey on the 1st day of another school year....!!

The unforgetable Smell from d Pages of New Books....!!

New Subjects....!

New Teachers.....!!

New Sitting Positions in d Class....!

N d Most Exciting was to Welcome our Best Friends in d Class.....!!

The sight of our secret 'crush' after a long gap....!!

D Pouring Rains Outside...!!!
The shopping for Raincoat !! Everything around us Freshend Up....
Lush Green....
Cold n Pleasant..!!

Wasn't it the most beautiful period of our lives...?!!

It can never return...

But u can always Close ur Eyes for a moment,
and try to Relive it.... :)





And dont forget 2 experience the same, through the Kidz' heart....!!!


Wishing u a 'nostalgic' June...!!!

Wednesday, June 12, 2013

I enjoyed reading this...It's fun!"

During a robbery in Guangzhou, China, the bank robber shouted to everyone in the bank:
"Don't move. The money belongs to the State. Your life belong s to you."Everyone in the bank laid down quietly. This is called "Mind Changing Concept" Changing the conventional way of thinking.

When a lady lay on the table provocatively, the robber shouted at her: "Please be civilized! This is a robbery and not a rape!"This is called "Being Professional" Focus only on what you are trained to do!

When the bank robbers returned home, the younger robber (MBA-trained) told the older robber (who has only completed Year 6 in primary school): "Big brother, let's count how much we got."The older robber rebutted and said: "You are very stupid. There is so much money it will take us a long time to count. Tonight, the TV news will tell us how much we robbed from the bank!" This is called "Experience." Nowadays, experience is more important than paper qualifications!

After the robbers had left, the bank manager told the bank supervisor to call the police quickly. But the supervisor said to him: "Wait! Let us take out $10 million from the bank for ourselves and add it to the $70 million that we have previously embezzled from the bank". This is called "Swim with the tide." Converting an unfavorable situation to your advantage!

The supervisor says: "It will be good if there is a robbery every month. "This is called "Killing Boredom." Personal Happiness is more important than your job.

The next day, the TV news reported that $100 million was taken from the bank. The robbers counted and counted and counted, but they could only count $20 million. The robbers were very angry and complained: "We risked our lives and only took $20 million. The bank manager took $80 million with a snap of his fingers. It looks like it is better to be educated than to be a thief!" This is called "Knowledge is worth as much as gold!"

The bank manager was smiling and happy because his losses in the share market are now covered by this robbery. This is called "Seizing the opportunity."Daring to take risks!"

Wednesday, May 1, 2013

BETI KA ANOKHA BAYAAN ..!

Dear Papa....

Beti bankar ayi hu ma-baap ke jivan me,

basera hoga kal mera kisi aur ke aangan me,

kyu ye reet "RAB" ne banai hogi,

kehte hai aaj nahi to kal tu parai hogi,

dekhe janam paal-poskar jisne hame bada kiya,

aur waqt aya to unhi hatho ne hame vida kia,

tut ke bikhar jati he humari zindagi wahi,

par phir bhi us bandhan me pyar mile zaruri to nahi,

kyu rishta humara itna ajib hota hai,

kya bas yahi betiyo ka nasib hota he??



Papa Says...

Bahut chanchal bahut
Khushnuma si hoti hai BETIYA

Nazuk sa dil rakhti hai Masoom si hoti hai BETIYA

Baat baat par roti hai
Nadan si hoti hai BETIYA

Rehmat se bharpoor
Khuda ki nemat hai BETIYA

Ghar mehak uthta hai
Jab muskrati hai BETIYA

Ajeeb si taklif hoti hai
Jab dusre ghar jati hai BETIYA

Ghar lagta hai suna suna Kitna rula ke jati hai BETIYA

Khushi ki jhalak
Babul ki ladli hoti hai BETIYA

Ye hum nahi kehte

Yeh toh "RAB " kehta hai. . .Ke Jab main bahut khush hota hu toh janam leti hai
PYARI SI BETIYA

Sunday, April 21, 2013

A Scene in near future-

Operator: Hello Pizza Hut!

Customer: Hello, can you please take my order?

Operator : Can I have your multi purpose Aadhar card number first, Sir?

Customer: Yeah! Hold on..... My number is 889861356102049998-45-54610

Operator : OK... you're... Mr Singh and you're calling from 17 Jalan Kayu. Your home number is40942366, your office 76452302 and your mobile is 0142662566. You are calling from you home number now.

Customer: (Astonished) How did you get all my phone numbers?

Operator : We are connected to the system, Sir.

Customer: I wish to order your Seafood Pizza...

Operator : That's not a good idea Sir.

Customer: How come?

Operator : According to your medical records, you have high blood pressure and even higher cholesterol level, sir.

Customer: What?... What do you recommend then?

Operator : Try our Low Fat Hokkien Mee Pizza. You'll like it.

Customer: How do you know for sure?

Operator : You borrowed a book titled 'Popular Hokkien Dishes' from the National Library last week, sir.

Customer: OK I give up... Give me three family size ones then.

Operator : That should be enough for your family of 10, Sir. The total is Rs. 2,450.

Customer: Can I pay by credit card?

Operator : I'm afraid you have to pay us cash, Sir. Your credit card is over the limit and you owe your bank Rs. 1,51,758 since October last year. That's not including the late payment charges on your housing loan, Sir.

Customer: I guess I have to run to the neighbourhood ATM and withdraw some cash before your guy arrives.

Operator : You can't Sir. Based on the records, you've exhausted even your overdraft limit.

Customer: Never mind just send the pizzas, I'll have the cash ready. How long is it gonna take anyway?

Operator : About 45 minutes Sir, but if you can't wait you can always come and collect it on your motorcycle.

Customer: What?

Operator : According to the details in the system , you own a motorcycle registration number 1123.

Customer: "????" (hmmm.. these guys know my motorcyle number too!)

Operator : Is there anything else, sir?

Customer: Nothing.! .. by the way... aren't you giving me that 3 free bottles of cola as advertised?

Operator : We normally would sir, but based on your records, you're also diabetic... In the best interest of your health, we are holding this offer for you.

Customer: ***%&$%%### You $##$%%@!)))

Operator: Better mind your language sir. Remember on 15th July 2007 you were imprisoned for 2 months and fined Rs.5,000 for using abusive language against a policeman...?

Customer faints...
A story tells that two friends were walking through the desert. During some point of the journey they had an argument, and one friend slapped the other one in the face. The one who got slapped was hurt, but without saying anything, wrote in the sand:

TODAY MY BEST FRIEND SLAPPED ME IN THE FACE.

They kept on walking until they found an oasis, where they decided to take a bath. The one who had been slapped got stuck in the mire and started drowning, but the friend saved him. After he recovered from the near drowning, he wrote on a stone:

TODAY MY BEST FRIEND SAVED MY LIFE:
The friend who had slapped and saved his best friend asked him, "After I hurt you, you wrote in the
sand and now, you write on a stone, why?" The other friend replied "When someone hurts us we should write it down in sand where winds of forgiveness can erase it away. But, when someone does something good for us, we must engrave it in stone where no wind can ever erase it."

LEARN TO WRITE YOUR HURTS IN THE SAND AND TO CARVE YOUR BENEFITS IN STONE.

They say it takes a minute to find a special person, an hour to appreciate them, a day to love them, but then an entire life to forget them.

Friday, April 12, 2013

There was a one hour interview on CNBC with Warren Buffet, the second richest man who has donated $31 billion to charity. Here are some very interesting aspects of his life: 1. He bought his first share at age 11 and he now regrets that he started to late! 2. He bought a small farm at age 14 with savings from delivering newspapers3. He still lives in the same small 3-bedroom house in mid-town Omaha, which he bought after he got married 50 years ago. He says that he has everything he needs in that house. His house does not have a wall or a fence. 4. He drives his own car everywhere and does not have a driver or security people around him. 5. He never travels by private jet, although he owns the world's largest private jet company. 6. His company, Berkshire Hathaway, owns 63 companies. He writes only one letter each year to the CEOs of these companies, giving them goals for the year. He never holds meetings or calls them on a regular basis. He has given his CEO's only two rules. Rule number 1: do not lose any of your share holder's money. Rule number 2: Do not forget rule number 1. 7. He does not socialize with the high society crowd. His past time after he gets home is to make himself some pop corn and watch Television. 8. Bill Gates, the world's richest man met him for the first time only 5 years ago. Bill Gates did not think he had anything in common with Warren Buffet. So he had scheduled his meeting only for half hour. But when Gates met him, the meeting lasted for ten hours and Bill Gates became = devotee of Warren Buffet. 9. Warren Buffet does not carry a cell phone, nor has a computer on his deskHis advice to young people: "Stay away from credit cards and invest in yourself and Remember: A. Money doesn't create man but it is the man who created money. B. Live your lives as simple as you are. C. Don't do what others say, just listen them, but do what you feel good.D. Don't go on brand name; just wear those things in which u feel comfortable. E. Don't waste your money on unnecessary things; just spend on them who really in need rather. F. After all it's your life then why give chance to others to rule❔
Husband: Last night I was sitting in the living room, talking to my wife about life..
In-between, we talked about the idea of living or dying.

i told her : Never let me live in a vegetative state, totally dependent on machines and liquids from a bottle. If you see me in that state I want you to disconnect all the contraptions that are keeping me alive, I'd much rather die'.

My wife got up from the sofa with this real look of admiration
towards me & proceeded to disconnect the Cable tv, & DVD, then the Computer, the Cell Phone, the iPod, and the Xbox, and then went to the bar and threw away all my whisky, rum, gin, vodka & the beer from the fridge...

I ALMOST DIED!!

Moral :
Think about what you talk, The female brain works on a different wavelength from the male's. πŸ˜‰
...
Read it whenever u have time. Though its long but really thought provoking:

At a restaurant, a cockroach suddenly flew from somewhere and sat on a lady. She started screaming out of fear. With a panic stricken
face and trembling voice, she started jumping, with both her hands desperately trying to get rid of the cockroach.

Her reaction was contagious, as everyone in her group also got
panicky.

The lady finally managed to push the cockroach away but ...it landed
on another lady in the group.

Now, it was the turn of the other lady in the group to continue the
drama.

The waiter rushed forward to their rescue. In the relay of throwing, the cockroach next fell upon the waiter.

The waiter stood firm, composed himself and observed the behavior of
the cockroach on his shirt.
When he was confident enough, he grabbed it with his fingers and threw it out of the restaurant.

Sipping my coffee and watching the amusement, the antenna of my mind
picked up a few thoughts and started wondering, was the cockroach
responsible for their histrionic behavior? If so, then why was the waiter not disturbed? He handled it near to perfection, without any chaos.

It is not the cockroach, but the inability of the ladies to handle the disturbance caused by the cockroach that disturbed the ladies.

I realized that, it is not the shouting of my father or my boss or my wife that disturbs me, but it's my inability to handle the
disturbances caused by their shouting that disturbs me.

It's not the traffic jams on the road that disturbs me, but my inability to handle the disturbance caused by the traffic jam that disturbs me.

More than the problem, it's my reaction to the problem that creates
chaos in my life.

Lessons learnt from the story:

I understood, I should not react in life.
I should always respond.
The women reacted, whereas the waiter responded.

Reactions are always instinctive whereas responses are always well
thought of, just and right to save a situation from going out of hands, to avoid taking decisions in anger, anxiety,

Sunday, March 31, 2013

A boy proposed his girlfriend for marriage,

Girl: Tell me... who do you love most in this world..?
Boy: You, of course!
Girl: what am I to you?
Boy: The boy thought for a moment and looked intently in her eyes and said "u r missing part of my heart" She smiled,and she accepted his proposal.After their wedding, the couple had a sweet and happy life for a while.However,the youthful couple began to drift apart due to the busy schedule of life and the never-ending worries of daily problems...their life became difficult.All the challenges posed by the harsh realities of life began to drift away their dreams and love for each other...The couple began to have more quarrels and each quarrel became make their relation
more worst.

One day, after the quarrel, the girl ran out of the house....
At the opposite side of the road, she shouted,
"You don't love me...!"

The boy hated her childishness and out of impulse, said,"May be, it was a mistake for us to be together..!
You were never da missing part of my ? ...!"

Suddenly, she turned quiet and stood there for a long while.... He regretted what he said but words spoken cant be taken back. With tears in her eyes, she went home to pack her things and Before leaving the house, she left a note for him:
"If I'm really not da missing part of ur ?, let me go..n search for sum1 whu is...It is less painful this way... let us go on our separate ways and search for our own partners..."

Five years went by....
He never remarried but he had tried tofind out about her life indirectly..... . She had left the country and was living her dreams. He use to regret on what he did but never tried to
bring her back.. In the dark and lonely night, he lit his
cigarette and felt the lingering ache in his heart.

He couldn't bring himself to admit that he was missing her.....
One day, they finally met.... At the airport, He was going away on a business trip .
He saw her,She was standing there alone, with just the security door separating them. She smiled at him gently.

Boy: How are you ?
Girl: I'm fine. How about you... Have you found your heart's missing part...?
Boy: No.
Girl: I'll be flying to New York in the next flight.
Boy: I'll be back in 2 weeks time. Give me a call when you are back...You know my number.... Nothing has changed.

With a smile, she turned around and waved good-bye..
"Good-bye . . ."

Same evening he heard of a plane crash which was headed to New York.He tried to know about her and found that,She died.

Midnight..... Once again, he lit his cigarette..... And like before, he felt the lingering ache in his heart.... He finally knew, she was that missing part that he had carelessly broken . . .
Sometimes, people say things out of moments of fury.....
Most often , the outcome is disastrous and fatal at tyms....
We take out our 99% frustrations at our loved ones....
And even though we know that we ought to"think twice and act wisely", we actually dont do it.

Things happen each day, many of which are beyond our control.
Try not to hurt ur loved once,bcz a moment of anger
cud b a lifetym punishment...!

Tuesday, March 26, 2013

What is Audit? Once upon a time there was a shepherd looking after his sheep on the side of a deserted road. Suddenly a brand new Porsche screeches to a halt. The driver, a man dressed in an Armani suit, Cerutti shoes, Ray-Ban sunglasses, TAG-Heuer wrist-watch, and a Pierre Cardin tie gets out and asks the shepherd, 'If I can tell you how many sheep you have, will you give me one of them?' The shepherd looks at the young man, then looks at the large flock of grazing sheep and replies, 'Okay.'The young man parks the car, connects his laptop to
the mobile-fax, enters a NASA Website, scans the ground using his GPS, opens a database and 60 Excel tables filled with algorithms and pivot tables. He then prints out a 150-page report on his high-tech mini-printer, turns to the shepherd and says, ''You have exactly 1,586 sheep.' The shepherd cheers, 'That's correct, you can have your sheep.'The young man takes one of the animals from the flock and puts it in the back of his Porsche. The shepherd looks at him and asks, 'If I guess your profession, will you return my animal to me?' The young
man answers, 'Yes, why not?' The shepherd says, 'You are an auditor.''How did you know?' asks the young man. 'Very simple,' answers the shepherd.'Firstly, you came here without being wanted. Secondly, you charged me a fee to tell me something I already knew. Thirdly, you don't understand anything about my business.....Now can I have my dog back? '

Thursday, March 14, 2013

WHY PARENTS SHOULD NOT TEXT...
Mom: Hi! Son, what does IDK, LY, & TTYL mean?
Son: I Don't Know, Love You, & Talk To You Later.
Mom: It's ok, don't worry about it...I'll ask your Sister, Love you too.
*****
Dad: Son, I have a Facebook account now...accept my friend request.
Son: You're on Facebook now?
WTF!!!
Dad: What does WTF mean?
Son: Ohhh...It means, Welcome To Facebook, Dad.
*****
Mom: Son, your grandmother passed away an hour ago. LOL
Son: How is that funny, mom?
Mom: What do you mean, Peter...surely it is not funny!
Son: Mom, LOL means: Laugh Out Loud!
Mom: Oh, No! I thought it meant: Lots Of Love...
I'll have to call everyone back and explain!πŸ˜œπŸ˜€πŸ˜Š

Monday, March 11, 2013

The World is Mine

Today, upon a bus, I saw a very beautiful woman,
And wished I were as beautiful.
When suddenly she rose to leave,
I saw her hobble down the aisle.
She had one leg and wore a crutch.
But as she passed, she passed a smile.
Oh, God, forgive me when I whine.
I have two legs; the world is mine.

I stopped to buy some candy,
The lad who sold it had such charm,
I talked with him, he seemed so glad,
If I were late, it'd do no harm.
And as I left, he said to me,
"I thank you, you've been so kind.
It's nice to talk with folks like you.
You see," he said, "I'm blind."
Oh, God, forgive me when I whine.
I have two eyes; the world is mine.

Later while walking down the street,
I saw a child I knew.
He stood and watched the others play,
but he did not know what to do.
I stopped a moment and then I said,
"Why don't you join them dear?"
He looked ahead without a word,
I forgot, he couldn't hear.
Oh, God, forgive me when I whine,
I have two ears; the world is mine.

With feet to take me where I'd go,
With eyes to see the sunset's glow,
With ears to hear what I'd know.
Oh, God, forgive me when I whine,
I've been blessed indeed, the world is mine.

If this poem makes you feel thankful, just forward
it to your friends.
After all, it's just a simple reminder that we
have so much to be thankful for!

Give the gift of love. It never comes back empty !

Saturday, March 9, 2013

Hello everyone....................It's another morning...

.... Again I have to go to office.

Ohh, this is me. I shouted having a glance on my snap in today's news paper. But what the HELL it is doing in the death column??
Strange.

One sec... Let me think, last night when I was going to bed I had a severe pain in my chest, but I don't remember anything after that, I think I had a sound sleep.

Its morning now, ohh... It's already 10:00 AM, where is my coffee? I will be late for office and my boss will get a chance to irritate me.
Where is everyone.??? I screamed.

"I think there is a crowd outside my room, let me check." I said to myself..
So many people... Not all of them crying. But why some of them crying.
WHAT IS THIS??? I m laying there on the floor.

"I AM HERE" . I shouted!!! No one listen.. "LOOK I AM NOT DEAD" . I screamed once again!!! No one is interested in me.
They all were looking me on the bed.

I went back to my bed room.

"Am I dead??" I asked myself.

Where is my wife, my children, my mom-DAD, my friends?

I found them in the next room, all of them were crying. still trying to console each other.

My wife was crying. she was really looking sad. My little kid was not sure what happened, but he was crying just coz his
mom was sad.

How can I go without saying my kid that I really love him, I really do care of him. ??
How can I go without saying my wife that she is really most beautiful and most caring wife in this world..??
How can I go without saying my parents that I m . just because of u ??
How can I go without telling my friends that without them perhaps I have done most of the wrong things in my life. thanks for being there always when I need them. and sorry for not being there when they really need me..

I can see a person standing in the corner and trying to hide his tears. Ohh. he was once my best friend, but a small misunderstanding made us part, and we both have strong enough ego to keep us disconnect.

I went there.. And offered him my hand, "Dear friend. I just want to say sorry for everything, we r still best friend, please forgive me."

No response from other side, what the hell?? He is still preserving his ego, I am saying sorry.. even then!!! I really don't care for such people.

But one sec.. it seems he is not able to see me!!!! He did not see my extended hand. My goodness. AM I REALLY DEAD???

I just sat down near ME; I was also feeling like crying.

"OHH GOD !!!! PLEASE JUST GIVE ME FEW MORE DAYS." I just wasn't to make my wife, my parents; my friends realize that how much I love them.

My wife entered in the room, she looks beautiful.. "YOU R BEAUTIFUL" I shouted. She didn't hear my words, in fact she never heard these words coz I never said this to her.

"GOD!!!!" I screamed. a little more time plzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.. I cried.

One more chance please. to hug my child, to make my mom smile just once, to feel my dad proud on me at least for a moment, to say sorry to my friends for everything I have not given to them, and thanks for still being in my life..

Then I looked up and cried!!!!

I shouted...

"GOD!!!! ONE MORE CHANCE PLEASE!!!!"

"You shouted in your sleep," said my wife as she gently woke me up. "Did you have a nightmare?"

I was sleeping.. Ohh that was just a dream..

My wife was there. she can hear me. This is the happiest moment of my life. I hugged her and whispered.. "U R THE MOST BEAUTIFUL AND CARING WIFE IN THIS UNIVERSE.. I REALLY LOVE U DEAR"

I can't understand the reason of the smile on her face with some tears in her eyes, still I m happy..


"THANK YOU GOD FOR THIS SECOND? CHANCE."


SO, Now it's not late.. Forget Ur Egos, Past. and Xpress Ur love to others. Be friendly. Keep smiling. for ever...


Keep our ego aside and express our love, care, appreciation, friendship, because we won't get a second chance always. Dont regret after the things happen. Always show our love to everyone who are associated with us!!!. Thank you for everything.
Pls all read
Its long but worth reading!

Thursday, March 7, 2013

A King had a male servant who, in all circumstances always said to him; My king, do not be discouraged because everything God does is perfect, no mistakes. One day, they went hunting and a wild animal attacked the king,the servant managed to kill the animal but couldn't prevent his majesty from losing a finger. Furious and without showing gratitude, the King said; if God was good,I would not have been attacked and lose one finger. The servant replied;Despite all these things, I can only tell you that God is good and everything He does is perfect,He is never wrong. Outraged by the response, the king ordered the arrest of his servant. While being taken to jail, he told the king again. God is Good & Perfect Later, he left for another hunt and was captured by savages who use human beings for sacrifice. In the altar, the savages found out that the king didn't have one finger in place, he was released because he was considered not "complete" to be offered to the gods.On his return to the palace, he authorized the release of his servant and said; My friend, God was really good to me. I was almost killed but for lack of a single finger I was let go. But I have a question; If God is so good, why did He allow me to put you in jail?. He replied; My king, if I had gone with you, I would have been sacrificed because I have no missing finger. Everything God does is perfect, He is never wrong.Often we complain about life, and the negative things that happen to us, forgetting that nothing is random,and that everything has a purpose. God knows why he chose you to receive thismessage today, please bless someone with it by sharing it. Everything happens for a reason, things do happen for our own Good. God is Great n Good.

Wednesday, March 6, 2013

Once upon a time an old man spread rumors that his neighbor was a thief. As a result, the young man was arrested. Days later the young man was proven innocent. After been released he sued the old man for wrongly accusing him. In court the old man told the Judge: 'They were just comments, didn't harm anyone..' The judge, before passing sentence on the case, told the old man: 'Write all the things you said about him on a piece of paper. Cut them up and on the way home, throw the pieces of paper out. Tomorrow, come back to hear the sentence.'The next day, the judge told the old man: 'Before receiving the sentence, you will have to go out and gather all the pieces of paper that you threw out yesterday.' The old man said: 'I can't do that! The wind spread them and I won't know where to find them.' The judge then replied: 'The same way, simple comments may destroy the honor of a man to such an extent that one is not able to fix it. "If you can't speak well of someone, rather don't say anything" 'Let's all be masters of our mouths, so that we won't be slaves of our words.'

Sunday, March 3, 2013

1 TO 10 FANTASTIC WORDS.

The most selfish one letter word. "I"
Avoid it.

The most satisfying two letter word. "We"
Use it.

The most poisonous three letter word. "Ego"
Kill it.

The most used four letter word. "Love"
Value it.

The most pleasing five letter word. "Smile"
Keep it :)

The fastest spreading six letter word. "Rumour"
✖✖Ignore it.✖✖

The hard working seven letter word. "Success"
Achieve it.

The most enviable eight letter word. "Jealousy"
↔↔Distance it.↔↔

The most powerful nine letter word. "Knowledge"
Acquire it.

The most divine ten letter word. "Friendship"
Maintain it :)

Thursday, February 28, 2013

Dear papa....
A BEAUTIFUL POEM  ..!

Beti bankar ayi hu ma-baap ke jivan me,

basera hoga kal mera kisi or ke angan me,

kyu ye reet bhagwan ne banai hogi,

kehte hai aj nhi to kal tu parai hogi,

deke janam paal-poskar jisne hame bada kiya,

aur waqt aya to unhi hatho ne hame vida kia,

tut ke bikhar jati he humari zindgi wahi,

par phir bhi us bandhan me pyar mile zaruri to nahi,

kyu rishta humara itna ajib hota hai,

kya bas yhi betiyo ka nasib hota he??

Beautiful poem Dedicated 2 cute DOLLS of parents.:

Bahut chanchal bahut
Khushnuma si hoti hai BETIYA

Nazuk sa dil rakhti hai Masoom si hoti hai BETIYA
Baat baat par roti hai
Nadan si hoti hai BETIYA

Rehmat se bharpoor
Khuda ki nemat hai BETIYA

Ghar mehak uthta hai
Jab muskrati hai BETIYA

Ajib si tak lif hoti hai
Jab dusare ghar jati hai BETIYA

Ghar lagta hai suna suna Kitna rula ke jati hai BETIYA

Khushi ki jhalak
Babul ki ladli hoti hai BETIYA

Ye h hum nahi kehte
Yeh toh "BHAGWAN " kehta hai ke Jab main bahut khush hota hu toh janam leti hai
PYARI SI BETIYA

When I got enough confidence, the stage was gone..
When I was sure of losing, I won.. When I needed people the most, they left me..
When I learnt to dry my tears, I found a shoulder to cry on..
When I mastered the skill of hating, Someone started loving me from the core of one's heart and
while waiting for light for hours when I fell asleep the sun came out.. That's LIFE!
No matter what you plan you never know what life has planned for you..
Live the moment. Live the suspense. Be surprised..!!!

Priceless!!!................

The Prince of Wales was driving around his Mother's estate one day when he accidentally ran over her most prized corgi dog.

  The poor unfortunate dog was crushed to a pulp! The Prince got out of his car, sat down on the grass, and started crying. the whole world was already against him and now his mother would be furious.

  Suddenly he noticed a lamp half buried by his foot. He dug up the lamp and polished it. Low and behold, all of a sudden, a genie appeared.

  "You've freed the genie from the lamp from thousands and thousands of years of imprisonment, and for freeing me I will grant you one wish".
"WOW" !!!! said the prince, this could really save my neck. "Well I have all the money and material things that I need, but let me show you this dog".

  The Prince and the genie walked over to the splattered remains of the dog. "Do you think you can bring this dog back to life", asked the Prince. The Genie looked carefully at the remains and gently shook his head.

  "This body is far too gone for even me to bring him back to life, isn't there anything else you would like instead"?

  The Prince thought for a moment, then reached into his pocket and pulled out two photographs.

  "I used to be married to this beautiful woman called Diana", said the Prince showing the genie the first photograph, "but now I love this woman called Camilla, do you think you can make Camilla as beautiful as Diana"?

  The Genie studied the two photographs and after a few moments said, "Let's have another look at that dog".

Sunday, February 24, 2013

A Polish man moved to the USA and married an American girl.
Although his English was far from perfect, they got along very well.
One day he rushed into a lawyer's office and asked him if he could
Arrange a divorce for him.
The lawyer said that getting a divorce would depend on the
Circumstances, and asked him the following questions:

Have you any grounds?
Yes, an acre and half and nice little home.

No, I mean what is the foundation of this case?
It made of concrete.

I don't think you understand.

Does either of you have a real grudge?
No, we have carport, and not need one.

I mean what are your relations like?
All my relations still in Poland .

Is there any infidelity in your marriage?
We have hi-fidelity stereo and good DVD player.

Does your wife beat you up?
No, I always up before her.

Is your wife a nagger?
No, she white.

Why do you want this divorce?
She going to kill me.

What makes you think that?
I got proof.

What kind of proof?
She going to poison me.

She buy a bottle at drugstore and put on shelf in bathroom.
I can read English pretty good, and it say:
" Regular POLISH
REMOVER"

Tuesday, February 19, 2013

".........FARQ......"
Sabhi insano me hota hai
Magar farq sirf itna hai...
Kuchh zakhm dete hai
Kuchh zakhm bharte hai...


...."HAMSAFAR"....

Sabhi hai magar
Farq sirf itna hai...

Kuchh sath dete hai
Kuchh chod dete hai...

....."PYAR"....

Sabhi karte hai
Magar farq sirf
Itna hai...

Kuchh jaan dete hai
Kuchh jaan lete hai...

...."DOSTI"...

Sabhi karte hai
Magar farq sirf
Itna hai....

Kuchh log nibhate hai
Kuchh log aajmate hai.,.

.....RISTA....
Kai logon se hota hai..
Magar farq sirf...
Itna hai....
Kuchh log use pyaar se nibhata hai.
Kuchh log nafrat karte hai..

......AHSAAS.....
Sabko hota hai...
Magar farq sirf....
Itna hai.
Kuchh log ise mehsoos kar pate hai.
Kuchh log ise samaj nahi pate..

.. ..ZINDAGI..
Sabhi jeete hai..
Magar Farq sirf
Itna hai..
Kuchh log sirf saans leke jeete hai.
Kuchh log dil ki dhadkan saanson me basa ke jeete hai...

Monday, February 18, 2013

There was a group of women at a seminar on how to live in a loving relationship with your husband. The women were asked, 'How many of you love your husbands?' All the women raised their hands. Then they were asked, 'When was the last time you told your husband you loved him?' Some women answered today, some yesterday, some didn't remember. The women were then told to take their cell phones and send the following text: I love you, sweetheart. Then the women were told to exchange phones and read the responding text messages. Here are some of the replies: 1. Who is this? 2. Eh, mother of my children, are you sick? 3. I love you too. 4. What now? Did you crash the car again? 5. I don't understand what you mean? 6. What did you do now? I won't forgive you this time. 7. ?!? 8. Don't beat about the bush, just tell me how much you need? 9. Am I dreaming? 10. If you don't tell me who this message is actually for, someone will die. 11. I asked you not to drink anymore. I'll leave if you are tired of ??????...

Sunday, February 3, 2013

Atul uncle says Psychologists Say :
1) If A Person Laughs Too Much,
Even At Stupid Things,
He Is Lonely Deep Inside.

2) If A Person Sleeps A Lot,
He Is Sad.

3) If A Person Speaks Less,
But Speaks Fast,
He Keeps Secrets.

4) If Some One Can't Cry,
He Is Weak.

5) If Some One Eats In An Abnormal Manner,
He Is Tensed.

6) If Some One Cries On Little Things,
He Is Innocent &
Soft-Hearted.

7) If Some One Becomes Angry Over Silly Or Petty (Small) Things,
It Means He Needs Love......

Try To Understand People.
We are living in such a World,
where Artificial Lemon Flavour is used for
Welcome Drink
&
Real Lemon is used in Fingerbowl .!!
gud morning friends...!!!πŸ™

Friday, January 25, 2013

A poor couple lived in a small village in India. They had only one son. They gave him the best education. Son graduated as an Engineer in the nearby city. Eventually he got married to a rich girl. Initially, they lived with his parents in the village. Soon the wife got tired of village life and persuaded the husband to move to the city leaving the old parents in the village. As time went the husband saw an ad in the newspaper about a vacancy in Jeddah. He was successful and lived in Jeddah for years with his wife. Regularly he used to send money to parents. Eventually with time he stopped and forgot about his parents whether they ever existed. Every year he performed hajj and immediately after each hajj, he used to see someone telling him in a dream that his hajj is not accepted. One day he related this story to a pious Aalim who advised him to go back to India to visit his parents. The man flew to India and reached the boundary of the village. Everything had changed. He could not find his house. He asked a small boy about the whereabouts of so and so. The little boy directed the man to a house and said : "In this house lives an old blind lady who lost her husband a few months ago. She has a son who migrated to Saudi Arabia years back and never came back again. What an unfortunate man?" Son enters the home and finds his mother on the bed. He tip-toed as he did not want to wake her up. He hears the mother whispering or mumbling something. He gets closer to hear her voice. This is what the mother was saying: "Ya Allah! I am now very old and blind. My husband just died. There is no mahram to lower me in my grave when I die. So please send my son to fullfill my last wish. " This is the ending of a story where the DUA of a mother is accepted. A human body can bear only 45 del (units) of pain. But at the time of giving birth, a mother feels upto 57 del (units) of pain... This is similar to 20 bones getting fractured, all at the same time!! This is just to tell you the extent to which a mother loves her child! 'Love your mom till the end of your life.The lady with whom you fight almost everyday, suffered so much pain just to give you a beautiful life!

Tuesday, January 22, 2013

After 2 years of selfless service, a man realized that he has not been
promoted, no transfer, no salary increase no commendation and that the
Company is not doing any thing about it. So he decided to walk up to his
HR Manager one morning and after exchanging greetings, he told his HR
Manager his observation. The boss looked at him, laughed and asked him to
sit down saying;

My friend, you have not worked here for even one day.
The man was surprised to hear this, but the manager went on to explain.

Manager:- How many days are there in a year? ❓
Man:- 365 days and some times 366

Manager:- how many hours make up a day?
Man:- 24 hours

Manager:- How long do you work in a day? πŸ•—
Man:- 8am to 4pm. i.e. 8 hours a day.
Manager:- So , what fraction of the day do you work in hours? ⏰
Man:- (He did some arithmetic and said 8/24 hours i.e. 1/3(one third)

Manager:- That is nice of you! What is one-third of 366 days?
Man:- 122 (1/3x366 = 122 in days)

Manager:- Do you come to work on weekends? 😯
Man:- No sir

Manager:- How many days are there in a year that are weekends? πŸ“†
Man:- 52 Saturdays and 52 Sundays equals to 104 days

Manager:- Thanks for that. If you remove 104 days from 122 days, how
many days do you now have?
Man:- 18 days.

Manager:- OK! I do give you 2 weeks sick leave every year. Now remove
that14 days from the 18 days left. How many days do you have remaining? 😀
Man:- 4 days

Manager:- Do you work on New Year day? 🎊
Man:- No sir!

Manager: - Do you come to work on workers day? 🚧
Man:- No sir!

Manager:- So how many days are left?
Man:- 2 days sir!

Manager:- Do you come to work on the (National holiday )? πŸ‡¬πŸ‡§
Man:- No sir!

Manager:- So how many days are left?
Man:- 1 day sir!

Manager:- Do you work on Christmas day?
Man:- No sir! πŸŽ„

Manager:- So how many days are left?
Man:- None sir!

Manager:- So, what are you claiming?
Man:- I have understood, Sir. I did not realise that
I was stealing Company money all these days.

Thursday, January 10, 2013

A father was reading his favourite magazine and his little daughter every
now and then distracted him. Trying to keep her daughter busy,he
tore out one page on which was printed the map of the world. He
then tore the page into pieces and asked
her to go to her room and put them together to make the map again.
Having done this, the father was now
convinced he would read his magazine without any disturbance and also that it
would take her daughter the whole day to get it done.
But the little one came back within two
minutes with the perfect map…………
?
?
?
?
?
?
The curious and confused father asked her daughter how she could do it so
quickly??
She giggled and said , "Oh…Dad, there is lord Ganesha's face on the other side of the paper, I made His face perfect to
get the map right."😊 Satisfied with the
answer, she ran outside to play leaving the
father surprised...πŸ˜‡
Moral of the story:
In life there is always the other side to whatever you
experience.
When ever we come across a challenge or puzzling situation,
look at the other side, you will be surprised
to see an easy way to tackle the problem..πŸ˜„
Stay blessed..